“A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another” (John 13:34-35, ESV).

IN THESE VERSES, Jesus addresses His closest companions—those who will eventually challenge, betray, deny, and doubt Him. But despite all of this, Jesus’ actions epitomized what it means to love your neighbor, even those who are hard to love. As His followers, how much more should we strive to love those who are hard to love? After all, they just might be the ones who need it most…  

Many years ago, I was assigned a co-teacher with whom I shared the same students, classroom, and teaching space. At first, I was happy. I had been teaching alone, and I was excited to have someone to partner with and share the workload. This teacher and I had about the same amount of teaching experience, so it seemed like we would be a good match. Very soon, however, I could sense that she was not as excited about our partnership. She seemed to view this arrangement as a competition and felt that I had a leg-up on her because I was in the classroom first. 

I tried my best to graciously show her love. I asked for her ideas, shared info about the students, and welcomed her into the desk area we both occupied. Unfortunately, she did not receive my offerings of friendship and peace. 

On the contrary, she took silent jabs at me by disrupting our workspace. She would turn over my pictures, change the computer background to remove my Bible verses, and move things around so I couldn’t find them. 

She also took not-so-silent jabs by mocking me when I mentioned my faith and trying to convince the students that they preferred working with her rather than me. It was exasperating.  

Even though I felt hurt and attacked just about every day, I began to pray fervently for her. I listened to her when she would talk, and I gently tried to show her love in the areas that seemed important to her…her family, her art, her pets, as well as her hurts, her fears, and her challenges in life. 

Although her behavior toward me did not change, my heart changed. God grew me during that time. He gave me compassion for her and showed me how to love her the way He loves me. 

By the end of the school year, I had become accustomed to coming in each day ready to remake my space as needed to function and show her the love of Jesus in whatever situation I faced. I made it to the end of the school year only by the grace of God.  

Then, before the beginning of the following school year, my principal told me my co-teacher had taken a job in another district. I didn’t see her or talk to her for many years.  

But one day, in God’s perfect timing, I ran into her at a professional development conference. I recoiled at first, remembering the sting of her actions from many years ago. But then, the gentleness of the Spirit nudged me. 

She approached me with a sweet smile, reached out to hug me, and softly said, “I want to tell you how sorry I am for all of the things I did to you. I was so mean to you. I know that, and you never once retaliated. I hated you, and I couldn’t figure out how in the world you could be the kind of person you were. I kept replaying the things you would say and the way you treated me so lovingly over and over in my mind, and I couldn’t stand to even think about working in that environment again. 

“Then, I began to share the reason I was leaving my job with my next-door neighbor. She didn’t even know you, but she was a Christian too. After listening to my berating and complaints about you, she told me that what I hated was not you, but the Jesus in you. God began chipping away at me. 

“I want you to know I gave my life to Christ, and I am changed. I am so thankful that you showed me Jesus all those years ago. Even when I was mean to you, you loved me, and I will forever be grateful.”  

God is good, and His stories are far better than we could ever write. He asked me to love my neighbor, even the most difficult one—I did my best, and He did the rest. 

Jenni Lou Jackson is a Christian Educators member, former middle school language arts teacher, and children’s ministry director in Kentucky.